So I have a 14 year old nephew who has recently started smoking. The kid is really smart and I’m worried he’ll loose interest in school. I think he’s 9th grade. He only sees his father for a few weeks a year since he is working outside the country. His mother is a stereotypical chronic smoker who doesn’t have much ambition in life. I don’t have any experience in the matter but he seems really young to even be dealing with this kind of stuff. I thought about calling him but I’m not sure what to say. He feels like a younger brother to me and I just want to make sure he takes advantage of all life has to offer. I don’t want him to stall out like his mother did. Should I be worried?
I don't think there is any link between smoking and being a bum. I know plenty of people who smoke, some who do well and others who don't. Do you have any other reasons for worrying that he might be losing interest in school or do you feel that by smoking he may be falling in with the wrong sort of crowd?
Dude, everyone tries smoking at that age. Most people snap out of it, others don't. Let natural selection take its course. If you want to interfere, buy him some weed. You should get involved if he seriously is going to quit school. Real life will own his ass if he does that. But a little cautious smoking, and drugs is normal for almost everyone I went to school with.
Buh? He's just smoking; it's not like he's on a crack pipe. I'd just watch out for any real signs of him falling by the wayside.
Still, a 14 year-old shouldn't be smoking. I think it'd be best to help him put an end to it anyway bfun. Approach him next time you see him smoking and just have a talk to him about it.
Well he’s still in middle school. It’s not like he has the rationalization of someone who is 20 and in college. I wouldn’t want it to become more important than getting good grades. He used to be an A student but I’ve heard his grades are slipping. Maybe it’s no big deal.
You should take him on a tour of the city based on income levels. Middle-school still gives you some breathing room to fuck up. High school literally determines the course of your life in America, so he should have a good understanding of what sector of the city he is likely to live in based on school performance.
That's utter bullshit. I know successful people who didn't even finish high school, my stepmother included. She used to be vice president of the largest trucking company in the US, and left to form her own company. She has a high six figure income. She makes more in a year than my mother did before she retired, and my mother has an MBA from Northwestern. She dropped out of high school because she got pregnant. She got a GED years later, but still. She's a successful high school dropout.
Take him to a hospital where they have a cancer wing or unit and let him see some poor fuckers with T3 lung cancers living with tubes up their nose and little to no chances of survival..having been to one several times in the last month I can bet that would make him think twice. Aside from that though you'll find its probably someone he's hanging around with (or wants to hang around with) from school that's encouraging that. Smoking starts socially so you should look at the people he associates with....and KILL THEM. A guy I know got his son a job when he started off smoking and behving badly at school straightened him out; a little responsibility and some money to show for it is always better than hanging around with some dicks from school..
To be honest there's probably not much you can do. My mum is a heavy smoker and after 2 collapsed lungs she still smokes, my 14 year old sister has now started smoking because her friends do. You think she'd know better but she's a stupid kid. My only advice would be tell him he stinks of smoke, tell him girls hate that smell, just anything really to make him consider how people perceive him.
@bfun: You and your damnable fuzziness. Hmmm, I know people who dabbled at that age. Like anything, it can be fine or it can become more of an issue. How do you know he's doing it?
His mother knows. She disproves but she is also a big time smoker so it's hard to lead by example. I'm sure he'd listen to his dad but he isn't around right now.
Same shit though really. If he were a little older I'd tell you to leave him to his "herbal" treats; they never hurt me when I was in college and university...although I'm majorly paranoid now but I'm not sure if I can lay the blame on old Jack Herrer for that.. But at 14 I'm gonna say his brain chemistry just won't be ready for it. Quicker you get him off it the better...i'd still show him the cancer ward though. Unless he's using a vaporiser he's gonna be fucking his lungs up.
Yeah I'll mention that to him. Maybe I can ask him to wait until he's 18. Like I said, he's pretty smart. If I can back it up with some good scientific facts he might listen. From what I've read the part of the brain that deals with reason isn't fully developed until much later.
Maybe for < 1% of people. If you're extremely ambitious, and lucky, anything is possible. But in our current economic shit storm, nothing good is going to come from dropping out of school.
The only other thing you can do is get him some absolutely mind blowingly strong super strain. A guy I went to University with was a pretty heavy dope smoker but the king of all whiteys put him off forever after he smoked something that looked like it came from another planet. Mind, you don't need to actually give him strong stuff to induce a whitey. If you think he's baked, talk to him for a bit and say that he looks a little pale or clammy. The great stuff about weed is that when people are stoned you can convince them of anything thanks to the paranoia inducing effects; just sow the seeds of a thought in their head. I've had a scream talking people into whiteys when I was younger. My favourite was the spiral staircase puzzle..their eyes start swirling and that's it..GAME OVER...Another good one is to not look them straight in the eye; look just above their nose on their brow. It totally bakes their noodle and will have a very strong effect on someone who is particularly stoned. It sounds cruel but seriously, a bad experience might just be enough to put him off for good.
If the lung carcinoma doesn't get you, a heart attack, stroke, COPD, or peripheral vascular disease (which leads to gangrene and amputations) will. Smoking is one of the absolute worst things you can do for your health short of running in front of an oncoming freight train. You may as well just put a gun to your head if you really want to die. It will be faster and less painful than dying of a smoking related illness.
Personally the way i see it, if he is that close to you (you see him as a younger brother) you can/should smack him up a bit.