Bedtime Stories

Discussion in 'monkeyCage' started by cmdrmonkey, Sep 30, 2014.

  1. I think I got my mom pregnant

    My mom and dad got divorced about six years ago. Since then it’s just been my mom, my sister and I. I get to see my dad once a month as he lives in Toronto and I live in Calgary. It’s hard to fly up and visit him as much as I’d like to due to this little thing called money which my family is short of. I’ve also haven’t seen my mom with another man since the divorce since she wants us to grow up before she gets involved in a relationship again.

    The Event:

    About four weeks ago my dad called my mom up in a drunken rampage and screamed at her for a good hour about how he was cheating on her while they were married, how he’s not going to pay child support and how my mom was the scum of the earth. This caused my mom to fall into an emotional breakdown and she was pretty fucked up that night. I came home from work and she was completely drunk. To be honest, I’ve never seen someone so drunk in my entire life. She was telling me about the phone call and how she wished my dad would just die. She was really open with her feelings and emotions and she was telling me a lot.

    She offered me some Vodka and I accepted, as I go crazy for that stuff. I love Vodka and I really just wanted to help her out. The last thing I wanted to do is refuse something from her and then have her start crying again. I had about seven shots and I started to get a little tipsy when she put her arm on me. Now usually I just push away as I hate the ‘mushy’ stuff from my mom. She always wants to spend time with me and touch me in a ‘mom – son’ way. Just love for your child I suppose but this time, I just accepted it I was really too drunk to care.

    What happened after this was completely unexpected. I’ve never thought about my mom this way before, not even the slightest. She’s my mom for fuck sakes. My mom told me to shut my eyes, and she kissed me on the lips. I was completely stunned. I didn’t know what to do so I just sat there.

    “I love you Eric”

    “Umm… I love you too mom”

    By this point, I was completely confused, even more so for a drunk. I didn’t have the slightest clue what was going on.

    “No, Not like that Eric…”

    She put her hand on my lap over my family jewels and then kissed me again. She then started kissing me furiously and passionately. She then pulled off her shirt and mine and pretty much, well pushed me onto the floor. She was on top of me and there was really not much I could do. I was being seduced by my own mom. I couldn’t believe it. Then we made a huge mistake…we had sex. I didn’t even want this. I didn’t even want my mom to touch me; I hate it when she touches me but the effects of alcohol took its place and turned us into horrible monsters. Although I don’t like to admit it, I had never had sex this great. We finished up and she left to go to the washroom to clean up. I don’t remember anything else about the night. I probally went to sleep waiting for her to come back. A lot of the night is fragmented and even today I still have trouble remembering it completely. In the morning she never mentioned it at all and she acted completely normal despite the fact that she fucked her own son.

    The Problem:

    Everything went fine up until today when my mom called me up at work.

    “Eric, we need to talk. It’s really important”

    I didn’t know what was going on. I thought maybe someone died or she found my porn stash.

    “Yeah Mom... What is it?”

    “I feel really uncomfortable about it; I don’t think I can explain it to you on the Phone”

    I told my mom that was alright and I’d be home from work in an hour and we could talk about it then.

    I get home and I see that my mom is sitting on the couch. Her face was all red, and I could tell that something really bad happened. It looked like she was crying for a long time.

    “What’s wrong?” I asked her

    “I think I’m pregnant”

    I was completely shocked. My mom hasn’t even dated another guy since she divorced my dad and I was a hundred percent sure that she wasn’t seeing another guy.

    “Did you take a test?”

    “Yeah, it’s positive”

    We just sat there completely still. I didn’t know what to say.
  2. My Boyfriend [24] farted on my face [22] for Thanksgiving, and I don't know how to forgive him.

    We've been dating for 2 months now, and I told him I wanted to have something special for Thanksgiving because it's our first big holiday together. He promised that he'll give me something special, and when I asked what, he 'joked' that he'll fart on my face.

    I took it as a joke and laughed about it.

    Come the actual day, we're just play-fighting on the bed as we sometimes do. He caught me in a vice-like grip and I couldn't get away, and lo and behold, butt in my face, he farted. Then, he bent down and whispered in my ear, 'Happy Thanksgiving Baby.' I went around telling everyone that's what he did, but no one would believe me! He's always going around acting like the good guy and ever too-polite. And now I'm the bad guy for trying to 'spread lies' about him.

    Urghs. I'm not answering any of his text messages and I'm not if this is the final straw for us. I made it clear that I wanted a nice celebration or gift, and all I got was a smelly fart in my face. I can't stop crying about this. It's like he doesn't care.

    Edit: To all those people saying that Thanksgiving gifts aren't a thing, well yes. It's usually dinner and food but we had an agreement. I spent a whole day making him cookies and what I got in return was this stunt which he's not taking seriously at all. Maybe I should have made that clear.
  3. #23 cmdrmonkey, Jul 8, 2019
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2019
    hahahhah I love how she has to go to see him again this weekend
  4. lol wtf. I hope this is trolling. If not, I feel like these days, most of the population has replaced the fight or flight response with crying and posting on the internet...
  5. #25 cmdrmonkey, Jul 9, 2019
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2021
    There's a high probability that it's a LARP, but I can't rule out the possibility it might be real.

    lol at the comments
  6. That sounds much more likely to be trolling than true.

    That is not happening. And she needs to meet up again to make sure he understands she disproves of him forcibly raping her husband? This sounds about as believable as internet stories that end with everyone dropping everything and spontaneously clapping for the storyteller's witty comeback.
  7. A woman can’t handle something like that with a text message or a phone call. It must be done in person, while wearing lingerie. Also she’s going back next weekend too just to make sure he understands.
  9. Dude kids these days are into some weird shit. Like they have this thing call no nut November. It’s like the literal pussification of America, to steal a phrase. These dumbasses are probably fucking up their testosterone levels beyond repair.

    And lol at cuckholding. That is literally outsourcing sex with your wife because you can’t be bothered. Just get a divorce and find someone you actually want to fuck.